. well you know. But they are still there. Even before I move I can feel them. In fact they are throbbing from where I tried to pull them. But I know something is not there. I remember that from before I fainted.I sit my naked frame up on the floor . Hands outstretched behind me, so that I can look down over/between my breasts at my groin.Pubic hair looks much as it did, but no longer does a line stretch to my belly button. But below it, sits the opposed and inviting labial folds that were once my scrotum.I do not touch it, for that would be to acknowledge it.Part of my brain is reminding me of what we were taught at psych. We need to grieve for a loss, whether that be a limb or an organ (I fancied mine as both.); but I will not grieve for it is not lost. Perhaps it is hidden. Perhaps this is all some sort of mind trickery. And even if it isn't, and Lisa has somehow done the impossible to me, I have been a man for 28 years, and will be again.I'm in the bathroom again now,. “He left yesterday,” Brittany said. “There’s some special school in Colorado that he’s going to for the summer and he had to be there June 1. He took an early final in a couple of his classes and they let him go.”“So, is he, like your boyfriend?” Joan asked. Brittany shook her head.“No. I can’t actually have a boyfriend or date until I’m fifteen, but Kent wouldn’t have qualified even if I was available. He’s too old. I didn’t really expect us to hang out after our project but you all kind of pulled us in a bit. It’s hard to pull away once a person enters your orbit.”“I am the sun and you are my planets,” Beca said dramatically. “You know, if you stay in orbit here too long, you’re going to end up with a boyfriend and four girlfriends.” Brittany blushed and glanced my way. Oh dear.We all just sat and stared at each other for a while. Summer. Scattered all over.“Rebeca, could I have the pleasure of a date with you this evening?” I asked. She looked at me with her mouth open.“Um ... well.
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